I JUST WANT TO BE A CHRISTIAN

and not a pastor's child...

Pastor's children deserve a special seat in heaven just by virtue of the office because it's a very tough role. 

For the longest time, I've always wondered why, of all the things to become in this world, my dad had to be a pastor!!!! 

These thoughts of mine were the result of several occurrences that I've had to go through. There are several underlying reasons as to why pastor's children never want to tow the paths that God chose their parents for, but then we know that who God has called, He has called regardless.

People have the most annoying ideas about pastor's children, like they should be perfect, blameless, and holy. They should never ever make mistakes; they should never ever fall sick, because tell me why someone said, "I don't know you people fall sick, ooh"! Guess my reply with a smile, of course. "No, we don't; we are actually super humans, but me, I didn't go to the meeting for power renewal, that is why this sickness happened!" #mtcheeewwwws

We are super humans because what is "Omo Pastor" "Not you of all people." #rolleyesindisgust

One of the first trainings that I was exposed to as a pastor's kid was "people.". I grew up seeing people go in and out of my house. My mom will always say, We are here to serve everybody; we are for the people. Because of the flood of guests, every pastor's child is inherently a host and a hostess. You would have to learn the civility of welcoming and treating guests. Hospitality is a trait that we are frequently exposed to. With others nearby, there is always the risk of losing privacy. Normal individuals enjoy the luxury of having their own bedrooms, mattresses, space, and everything else. A pastor's child learns to share and contribute from a young age, whether they choose to or not. They even have to share their parents with other church members. Being around people exposes you to a variety of personalities. Normal, semi-normal, almost not normal, absolutely not normal, sane, magnificent, and wonderful people. The wit and know-how of handling people also come from this exposure.

Living with some of these people has exposed us to battles of diverse kinds. You know how someone comes under your roof, seeking shelter and help, and then whatever is pursuing that person suddenly makes you their focus instead. A pastor's child is then exposed to warfare and is taught to fight early. Some of us have the scars of war; others became victims of war; and others are simply no more.

I'll add something to the warfare that every pastor's child is exposed to. I personally believe that what Satan does is this: "If they don't get the man, they'll come for the child of the minister." 

MY ADVICE- is to never do ministry at the expense of your home. Love the flock, but please guard your own too. Teach your sons to fight.

Pastor's child, fight! War is the fight of faith, and never sleep on the battles that should be fought.

You see, I grew up under the strictest of upbringings. I don't know if this is because my father is a pastor (he is not even just a pastor; he is a reverend plus a sectional leader) or because he is naturally a disciplinarian.

Many times, what I wanted to do clashed with what my parents expected of me. I grew up with a lot of dos and don'ts, which made things difficult at times. Obeying and adhering to so many dos and don'ts was extremely challenging. I wanted to live, do, dress, and behave in a certain way, but the authorities urged me to do otherwise.

You keep hearing things like "People are looking up to you,"  "Don't bring shame to this family," and "What will people say?"  You can't dress in a certain way, be in certain places, or work in certain places too, so you don't bring shame to the family and church. Omoooooo!!!!!

I have always wanted to be a tomboy, to dye my hair and loc it, and to have piercings. Please don't ask why, but it's one of the many, many things that I've wanted to do. My father, whom I know, would never allow you to do that, and I knew this very well, so for the longest time, I had to bury that idea.

I would say that one of the main reasons I have not gone against what my parents have said and the many dos and don'ts that are in place is HONOR, which I believe many children of pastors lack. The question of honor is the outright contradiction that eventually leads to disobedience, which sometimes ends in large conflicts and controversy between pastors and their children. The Lord introduced me to the verse "Honor thy Father and thy Mother that thy days may be long" very early. He taught me that obeying my parents and following their directions was part of the honor I could show them.

I never want my father to feel ashamed because of me. I've always wanted to hear him speak about me with pride and confidence. Most importantly, I want his blessings whenever I set out to do something, so I've learned to obey and endure the many things I've had to undergo because he is the authority God has placed over me, and I've seen how much God despises rebellion, so that is a component I don't want to give up. There is also the issue of disobedience and how much God despises it. The Bible is also extremely clear about how God views both rebellion and disobedience.

PS: Do not drag honor and obedience out of the context in which I'm using them. Then the cases of conflict between pastors and their children can differ in diverse ways. 

This is my counsel to every pastor's child: obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Please honor your father and mother so that your days will be long. You may need to involve very important and wise third parties sometimes in the clash of wills between pastors and their children.

Overall, I think we should let Pastor's children breathe; don't suffocate them. We have other responsibilities; we are human beings, not angels. They can make mistakes too, they can have a social life, and their lives should not revolve only around the church.

I strive to be a good Christian and love God as much as I can, just like everyone else. And maybe you people should be looking up to God, so you don't get disappointed because I don't know why you should be looking up to me 🤷.🤷

I might make this a series but then, let see how it goes..

What do you think about pastor's children?

If you are a pastor's child what are some things you feel people should cut some slack on?

You know how we roll, please ensure to write back to me because it warms my heart. Thank you my dearest

Until next weekend

Love,

Fayvourebirth 💖